Constructive Complaining

Community Manager — Thu, 06 May 2010 13:19:00 GMT

To complain is human.

But, with the downturn in the economy and upswing in everyday pressures on-the-job, complaining has taken on a life of its own in the typical workplace. As a recent Wall Street Journal article titled Misery Poker: It's One Game Worth Losing observes: "As times get tougher, complaining is starting to look more like a blood sport than a coping mechanism. Stressed to the max and desperate for everyone to know it, many of us are trying to trump each other with our carping."

This steady stream of grumbles is not good for business. In fact, according to a post from the Chief Happiness Officer, it can be quite toxic since it:

Becomes habitual
Colors perception
Makes people despondent
Kills innovation
Thwarts relationships
Creates office factions
Promotes pessimism

To prevent and offset this environmental hazard in the workplace, we need to learn and encourage constructive complaining. When we complain constructively, we complain about:

The right thing
At the right time
To someone who can do something about it

We also engage in some honest self-scrutiny to make sure that our complaint is firmly grounded in some objective reality as opposed to our own irrationality.

According to an article that asks Can You Go 21 Days Without Complaining?, we can avoid making unconstructive complaints if we:

Write down what is bothering us
Consider what we can do to change the situation
Channel the complaint into a more productive response
Identify something positive about the scenario

In addition to the above suggestions, I always appreciate it, if when someone complains to me they take the time to offer a suggestion on how to fix the issue. In my opinion, this can be the most constructive use of complaining, because it can be used not only to vent, but to solve problems!

If you want to be a more constructive complainer, you can start the process by taking this Constructive Complaining Quiz. Feel free to share your results and feedback with us and the Beyond Folders Community.

by Candie Harris

Understanding Workplace Conflict

Community Manager — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 12:54:00 GMT

What do we learn every day wading through media streams, talking to disgruntled co-workers or engaging with our teenage children?

Conflict is part of life.

Workplace conflict can be particularly toxic because it disrupts worker productivity, hampers professional collaboration and jeopardizes the business bottom line.

Here are a few common causes of on-the-job conflict (as cited by CareerBuilder.com):

Differences in communication styles
A lack of a clear vision or mission
Unclear job expectations

According to this Entrepreneur article, conflict is really about tension that most of us respond to in one of three ways:

We shy away and are "reluctant to get involved in conversations that may be challenging, heated or potentially negative"
We overcompensate by reacting in a way that is "too loud, offensive or demeaning"
We take a proactive approach and embrace the situation with an open mind and willingness to interact

Whatever response we are naturally inclined to have, we can become better conflict managers if we heed expert advice that conflict can be a positive and constructive force in the workplace. It helps to look at the situation with an empathic eye by putting yourself in the other person's shoes. The odds of a good and healthy resolution also increase when we are able to see how we contributed to the conflict (since it is never a one-way street). I have shared that advice many times with my own children, in an effort to help them successfully resolve conflicts they have faced in their lives.

When conflict erupts - as it inevitably will - you and your co-workers might benefit from some or all of these strategies for dealing with difficult people at work. If you have any other conflict resolution strategies, please feel free to share them with us.

by Candie Harris

Beyond Folders : resolution, communication, workplace conflict

Constructive Complaining

Understanding Workplace Conflict